1 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:00,520 What about a pork pie, Mum? 2 00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:03,290 Certainly not, Nigel. Pork pies are common. 3 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:09,190 - What about some fresh cheese, then? - Don't be silly, you don't know where it's been. 4 00:02:09,190 --> 00:02:12,960 I'll have some nice Dairylea slices. 5 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:14,030 Right you are. 6 00:02:14,030 --> 00:02:17,230 'My mother was always averse to fresh produce. 7 00:02:17,230 --> 00:02:22,140 'I'm Nigel, I'm nine years old and I've never had a vegetable that didn't come in a tin.' 8 00:02:22,140 --> 00:02:24,510 - Thank you, Mrs Slater. - Come on, Nigel. 9 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,950 Come on! What on earth have you been doing? 10 00:02:31,950 --> 00:02:33,820 Oh, come on. 11 00:02:37,550 --> 00:02:41,690 'It must have been the lack of nutrients that gave my father his fiery temper. 12 00:02:41,690 --> 00:02:45,160 'He was not a sweet man, despite a very sweet tooth.' 13 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:47,130 Not like that, man! 14 00:02:51,730 --> 00:02:56,910 'My mother's sweet nature made up for her inability to cook, or even make a sandwich. 15 00:02:59,310 --> 00:03:04,180 'When you're deprived of something, it just makes you all the more hungry for it.' 16 00:03:12,350 --> 00:03:16,260 - Can we make the cake, then? - If we have to. 17 00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,730 Oh! 18 00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:24,870 What does that say? 19 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:30,310 I can't even read this. Right, flour. 20 00:03:32,510 --> 00:03:33,680 16 ounces. 21 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:34,810 Ooh! 22 00:03:36,150 --> 00:03:38,310 I think that's enough. 23 00:03:38,310 --> 00:03:39,850 Oh, yes, sieve it. 24 00:03:39,850 --> 00:03:43,290 And some butter. 25 00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:45,190 Oh. 26 00:03:45,190 --> 00:03:46,720 Mum... 27 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:49,430 Oh, dear. Daddy will be pleased. 28 00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:50,860 Mum, let me do it. 29 00:03:56,730 --> 00:03:59,230 Shh, listen. 30 00:04:13,820 --> 00:04:17,190 Don't worry, we'll cheer it up with a little icing. 31 00:04:24,930 --> 00:04:26,600 It's not too bad. 32 00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,770 Mum, the dinner! 33 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,340 They're all burnt. 34 00:04:37,340 --> 00:04:40,080 I think I'd better make some toast. 35 00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:57,430 'No matter how bad things get, it's impossible not to love someone who made you toast. 36 00:04:57,430 --> 00:05:01,760 'Once you've bitten through that crusty surface to the soft dough underneath 37 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:05,100 'and tasted the warm, salty butter, you're lost forever.' 38 00:05:11,410 --> 00:05:12,780 More tea, anyone? 39 00:05:26,690 --> 00:05:27,990 Oh. 40 00:05:31,530 --> 00:05:33,060 Aaah. 41 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,800 Mmm. 42 00:05:41,770 --> 00:05:43,840 Aaah... 43 00:05:43,840 --> 00:05:45,570 - What you doing? - Oh! 44 00:05:45,570 --> 00:05:48,510 - Nothing. - Go to sleep, young man. 45 00:05:59,990 --> 00:06:02,160 Aaah. 46 00:06:03,590 --> 00:06:05,690 Oooh. 47 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:11,300 Mmm. 48 00:06:13,070 --> 00:06:15,300 Right, I'm off. 49 00:06:25,180 --> 00:06:28,280 You don't suppose there's anything wrong with him, do you? 50 00:06:40,060 --> 00:06:43,200 There you go. And was it a pound of streaky bacon? 51 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:44,630 Yes, please. 52 00:06:48,670 --> 00:06:52,670 - There you go, Mrs Patten. - Thank you. 53 00:06:53,910 --> 00:06:56,410 - Yes, Mr Salt? - A pound of Caerphilly, please. 54 00:06:56,410 --> 00:06:57,180 Right. 55 00:07:00,980 --> 00:07:02,650 Anything else I can get you? 56 00:07:02,650 --> 00:07:05,490 - Some raspberries, please. - Right you are. 57 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:26,510 Hi, Nige. 58 00:07:51,630 --> 00:07:53,300 Let's get to work, then. 59 00:07:56,340 --> 00:07:58,070 'What are you doing?' 60 00:07:58,070 --> 00:07:59,980 Making compost. 61 00:08:02,080 --> 00:08:03,610 What's compost? 62 00:08:04,950 --> 00:08:09,350 Sort of nature's way of melting everything together. 63 00:08:09,350 --> 00:08:10,490 Come here. 64 00:08:11,820 --> 00:08:13,820 Give us your hand. 65 00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:18,860 - Right, feel that. - It's hot! - Cool, eh? 66 00:08:18,860 --> 00:08:22,700 Everything breaking down lets all the goodness out. 67 00:08:22,700 --> 00:08:25,230 That's what I love about gardens. 68 00:08:25,230 --> 00:08:26,870 What? 69 00:08:26,870 --> 00:08:29,910 They're alive. 70 00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:32,570 - How do you mean, alive? - Come here. 71 00:08:33,940 --> 00:08:39,150 Right now, there's 100,000 biological reactions going on all around us. 72 00:08:39,150 --> 00:08:41,720 Thousands of new things being born. 73 00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:46,390 All these smells and tastes - no wonder it's an assault on the senses. 74 00:08:46,390 --> 00:08:49,730 That's what nature's all about, ain't it? 75 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:51,360 What? 76 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:52,730 Get on. 77 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,930 Right. 78 00:08:56,930 --> 00:08:58,700 Smell this. 79 00:08:58,700 --> 00:09:00,270 Do you know what that's called? 80 00:09:04,570 --> 00:09:06,510 Go on. Have a guess. 81 00:09:06,510 --> 00:09:10,380 - I don't know. - Well, what does it make you think of? 82 00:09:11,950 --> 00:09:14,850 Parma Violets? 83 00:09:14,850 --> 00:09:18,390 - Pleasure. - Pleasure? - Yeah. 84 00:09:18,390 --> 00:09:19,690 Cool, eh? 85 00:09:36,970 --> 00:09:40,440 Can you really eat them like that? Aren't they dirty? 86 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:44,780 There's plenty of things they'll tell you is dirty that won't do you any harm. 87 00:09:44,780 --> 00:09:48,450 - In fact, most of them's good for you in my opinion. - Such as? 88 00:09:48,450 --> 00:09:51,120 Gardening. 89 00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:52,390 What do they taste like? 90 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:57,230 You don't know unless you try. 91 00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:59,330 Please yourself. 92 00:09:59,330 --> 00:10:01,530 Nigel? 93 00:10:01,530 --> 00:10:04,430 Nigel, come on. 94 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,100 A tin of braised beef, 95 00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:12,470 a tin of sponge pudding and a tin of mixed veg, please. 96 00:10:12,470 --> 00:10:14,340 Can we have spaghetti bolognese? 97 00:10:15,580 --> 00:10:18,810 - I beg your pardon, Nigel? - Spaghetti bolognese. 98 00:10:18,810 --> 00:10:22,350 It's from Italy. The sauce comes in a tin. 99 00:10:22,350 --> 00:10:25,890 I wouldn't know how to cook such a thing. 100 00:10:25,890 --> 00:10:27,360 I'll show you. 101 00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:29,730 Are you sure this is a good idea? 102 00:10:30,990 --> 00:10:32,560 You have to put it IN the pan. 103 00:10:40,700 --> 00:10:42,070 What on earth's this? 104 00:10:42,070 --> 00:10:45,510 - It's spaghetti bolognese. It's Italian. - Italian? 105 00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:50,850 What the hell's wrong with you, Nigel? It's rock hard. 106 00:10:50,850 --> 00:10:52,010 It isn't cooked yet. 107 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:57,820 Stupid idea if you ask me. 108 00:11:02,690 --> 00:11:04,360 See, I told you it wouldn't fit. 109 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,770 - What the hell's this? - Cheese. 110 00:11:11,770 --> 00:11:14,900 Percy Salt said you have to put it on or it doesn't work. 111 00:11:16,270 --> 00:11:18,670 - It smells like sick. - Alan! 112 00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:25,450 I don't think so. 113 00:11:34,260 --> 00:11:36,830 Here goes. 114 00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:46,800 Mmm, it's delicious. 115 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,670 You twiddle it round. 116 00:12:01,380 --> 00:12:02,820 I think it's off. 117 00:12:11,260 --> 00:12:13,800 Nigel, get Mum's bag. 118 00:12:15,430 --> 00:12:16,800 Get Mum's bag! 119 00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:24,010 Well, come on, Nigel! 120 00:12:26,740 --> 00:12:28,910 Stupid boy! Come on. 121 00:13:04,780 --> 00:13:07,450 I think I'd better make some toast. 122 00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,490 'I think she's pregnant.' 123 00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:11,590 Pregnant? 124 00:13:11,590 --> 00:13:13,560 It's to do with her breathing. 125 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:17,530 Breathlessness, nausea. I'm telling you, it's the same as my mum. 126 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:20,630 Sick all the time for no reason, picky with food. 127 00:13:20,630 --> 00:13:22,770 Nine months later, hello! 128 00:13:22,770 --> 00:13:24,570 Out pops our Julie. 129 00:13:24,570 --> 00:13:26,900 How do you think she got pregnant? 130 00:13:26,900 --> 00:13:28,500 For Pete's sake, Nigel. 131 00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:31,070 I don't think they've had... ..sex 132 00:13:31,070 --> 00:13:33,980 for years. - You'd be surprised. 133 00:13:35,740 --> 00:13:38,380 Oh, milk. I think I'm going to throw up. 134 00:13:38,380 --> 00:13:41,520 Hey, I'll have it if you're not going to drink it. 135 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,020 - What's it worth? - I'll show you me knickers. 136 00:13:45,020 --> 00:13:46,590 - I'd let you see my willy. 137 00:13:46,590 --> 00:13:52,560 - What? - Then if you give me your puddings, I'll give you a feel. 138 00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:54,730 Well, actually, I go home for dinners. 139 00:13:54,730 --> 00:13:57,070 Well, just bear it in mind for the future. 140 00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:03,940 Here. You can have it for nowt. 141 00:14:03,940 --> 00:14:05,440 The offer's there, Nigel. 142 00:14:08,580 --> 00:14:11,450 'Josh, how can you tell if someone's pregnant?' 143 00:14:11,450 --> 00:14:16,120 - Well, you ain't been messing about with someone, have you? - Not me, my mum. 144 00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:17,790 Your mum. 145 00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:19,920 She keeps getting sick all the time. 146 00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:24,230 Well, she doesn't look very pregnant, Nige. 147 00:14:24,230 --> 00:14:26,830 I hope not. 148 00:14:26,830 --> 00:14:29,360 What's wrong with being pregnant, anyways? 149 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:30,900 I'm scared that... 150 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:37,570 ...if she goes into hospital, I'll have to be looked after by my dad. 151 00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:48,850 Oh, no. I'd better go inside. 152 00:14:48,850 --> 00:14:50,620 Why? 153 00:14:50,620 --> 00:14:52,690 I love it when it rains in the summer. 154 00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:01,030 Anyway, what's the matter with your dad? 155 00:15:01,030 --> 00:15:03,200 I don't think he likes me. 156 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:05,970 Don't be daft, what's not to like? 157 00:15:05,970 --> 00:15:08,600 I think he thinks there's something wrong with me. 158 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:30,230 You daft bugger! Come on. 159 00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:31,530 Come on, Nige. 160 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,140 Put that on till these dry. 161 00:15:56,150 --> 00:15:58,320 There's nothing wrong with you, Nigel. 162 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:01,020 Everything's going to be OK. 163 00:16:04,030 --> 00:16:05,160 Here. 164 00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:13,900 I love a pork pie, me. 165 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,640 Hurry up, Nigel! 166 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:25,150 Oh, come on, come on! 167 00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:50,910 - Are we nearly there yet? - Nigel, we haven't even left Wolverhampton yet. 168 00:16:50,910 --> 00:16:53,080 Do we have to go to Penarth? 169 00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:56,180 It's very good for the air. 170 00:16:56,180 --> 00:16:59,310 Just try to enjoy yourself, Nigel. 171 00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:00,980 For your mother's sake. 172 00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:06,520 There's nothing to do in Penarth. 173 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,320 Nonsense. 174 00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:11,860 It's the premier resort on the Welsh coast. 175 00:17:14,630 --> 00:17:16,300 It could be worse. 176 00:17:16,300 --> 00:17:18,530 They say it's going to pick up tomorrow. 177 00:17:18,530 --> 00:17:20,470 Oh, struth. 178 00:17:32,510 --> 00:17:34,950 Come on, Nigel. Nigel! 179 00:17:36,620 --> 00:17:39,220 Sit up, Nigel. Tomato, anybody? 180 00:17:40,890 --> 00:17:43,930 You don't have to have salad cream if you don't want it. 181 00:17:47,230 --> 00:17:50,600 - Do I have to have ham? Course you bloody well have to have ham! 182 00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:53,070 - You're on holiday. - Nigel, you like ham. 183 00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:56,410 I know I like ham, I just don't like the jelly. 184 00:17:56,410 --> 00:18:01,410 - Can't we go and get fish and chips? - Look, just eat, for God's sake. For your mother. 185 00:18:06,380 --> 00:18:11,650 Look at that! Absolutely disgusting. Letting a child run around naked like that. 186 00:18:11,650 --> 00:18:14,420 - I don't see anything wrong with it. - Don't be stupid, Nigel. 187 00:18:14,420 --> 00:18:18,030 - Loads of people go around naked. - Don't be ridiculous. 188 00:18:18,030 --> 00:18:19,660 Who have you seen naked? 189 00:18:19,660 --> 00:18:21,600 Josh. 190 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,930 - Josh? - Oh, my God! - He was only getting changed. 191 00:18:27,870 --> 00:18:29,940 Has Josh ever... 192 00:18:29,940 --> 00:18:34,640 has he ever touched you? - Alan, Alan... - Of course he hasn't. 193 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,610 Just eat your ham, Nigel. 194 00:18:36,610 --> 00:18:39,280 We'll forget the whole thing. 195 00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,850 Whee! Whee! 196 00:18:42,850 --> 00:18:47,160 - I'm going to have a word with those parents. - Alan, calm down. 197 00:18:59,770 --> 00:19:01,540 Oh, for Pete's sake! 198 00:19:06,310 --> 00:19:11,280 Oh, come back here, you stupid, ignorant boy! 199 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,020 Oh, for Pete's sake. 200 00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:43,510 Mum, can I ask you a question? 201 00:19:43,510 --> 00:19:45,510 You're not pregnant, are you? 202 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,880 What on earth makes you ask that? 203 00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:51,120 You keep doing all that heavy breathing. 204 00:19:53,490 --> 00:19:55,360 It's my lungs, Nigel. 205 00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,730 I'm not going to be very well, 206 00:19:59,730 --> 00:20:02,230 maybe for quite a long time. 207 00:20:03,530 --> 00:20:06,270 But you'll be all right by Christmas, won't you? 208 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:09,940 I don't know, Nigel. 209 00:20:09,940 --> 00:20:13,810 But you'll still teach me how to make mince pies, won't you? 210 00:20:13,810 --> 00:20:17,650 - Of course I will. - Promise? 211 00:20:19,210 --> 00:20:20,820 I promise. 212 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:51,850 Just because there's something wrong with her lungs doesn't mean to say she's not pregnant. 213 00:20:51,850 --> 00:20:53,820 What about Parma Violets? 214 00:20:53,820 --> 00:20:56,320 Don't be stupid, they're for old people. 215 00:20:56,320 --> 00:21:00,420 Anyway, I'm not interested in your opinion. I'm going to ask Josh about it. 216 00:21:00,420 --> 00:21:03,560 - How about some Love Hearts? - Piss off! 217 00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:04,990 They're for girls. 218 00:21:04,990 --> 00:21:10,430 You fancy that gardener, don't you? What about some Pascall's oblong fruit bonbons? 219 00:21:10,430 --> 00:21:13,900 Honestly? They'll put you in a retirement home. 220 00:21:13,900 --> 00:21:17,470 And, no, I don't, I'm just interested in gardening, that's all. 221 00:21:17,470 --> 00:21:19,340 Are you bollocks. 222 00:21:19,340 --> 00:21:22,410 All you've ever planted is a row of radishes. 223 00:21:22,410 --> 00:21:26,350 Anyway, re your mum, the jury's out in my opinion. 224 00:21:26,350 --> 00:21:27,850 What about barley sugars? 225 00:21:27,850 --> 00:21:31,220 We're not getting barley sugars, Warrel, we're not going in a car. 226 00:21:32,990 --> 00:21:37,930 I'll buy a packet of Refreshers and a quart of chocolate limes so we can burn our tongues! 227 00:21:40,060 --> 00:21:45,230 Yes, boys? A quart of chocolate limes and a packet of Refreshers, please. 228 00:21:45,230 --> 00:21:46,640 Oh, and a pork pie. 229 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,600 What's the pork pie for? 230 00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:20,700 Who are you? 231 00:22:20,700 --> 00:22:23,810 I'm the new gardener, who are you? 232 00:22:23,810 --> 00:22:28,480 - Where's Josh? - I don't know. I was just told to come down here twice a week from now on. 233 00:22:30,380 --> 00:22:36,050 - Well, would you like half a pork pie? I bought it myself. - No. 234 00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:57,010 Dad, what have you done to Josh? 235 00:22:57,010 --> 00:22:59,610 I haven't done anything to Josh. 236 00:22:59,610 --> 00:23:01,610 Joshua doesn't work for us anymore. 237 00:23:03,610 --> 00:23:05,780 We have a new gardener, Mr Watford. 238 00:23:05,780 --> 00:23:08,980 - Josh was my friend. - Joshua is not your friend! 239 00:23:08,980 --> 00:23:12,690 Now, I want you to put Joshua right out of your mind! Ow! 240 00:23:12,690 --> 00:23:15,720 And I don't want you to ever mention his name again! 241 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:18,590 - I want you to take this up to your mother. - I hate you. 242 00:23:22,430 --> 00:23:25,130 I'm warning you, Nigel... 243 00:23:25,130 --> 00:23:27,040 Now take this up to your mother. 244 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:30,670 And whatever you do, don't disturb her. 245 00:24:17,150 --> 00:24:18,190 Thank you. 246 00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:33,200 Dad! 247 00:24:34,940 --> 00:24:37,440 Dad! Dad! 248 00:24:40,780 --> 00:24:43,310 I told you not to disturb her! 249 00:25:14,110 --> 00:25:15,140 Come on. 250 00:25:15,140 --> 00:25:17,450 Let's have a crumpet. 251 00:25:37,270 --> 00:25:40,270 She's not going to be better for Christmas, is she? 252 00:25:46,810 --> 00:25:48,410 No, son. 253 00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:57,220 Look... 254 00:26:07,100 --> 00:26:11,870 What's going to happen to her? Is she going to be all right? 255 00:26:15,070 --> 00:26:17,670 Nigel, erm... 256 00:26:24,450 --> 00:26:26,320 Everything's going to be fine. 257 00:26:42,770 --> 00:26:43,630 Nigel? 258 00:26:45,070 --> 00:26:46,200 Mum? 259 00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:48,070 Aren't you supposed to be in bed? 260 00:26:48,070 --> 00:26:49,340 I want you to help me. 261 00:26:49,340 --> 00:26:50,970 What with? 262 00:26:50,970 --> 00:26:52,270 Mince pies. 263 00:26:53,410 --> 00:26:55,410 It's not even Christmas yet. 264 00:26:55,410 --> 00:26:57,110 Doesn't matter. 265 00:26:57,110 --> 00:26:59,680 Now you do it. 266 00:27:03,150 --> 00:27:04,450 - Oh, Mum... - All right. 267 00:27:04,450 --> 00:27:05,550 It's all right. 268 00:27:05,550 --> 00:27:07,220 Just stick it back down there. 269 00:27:07,220 --> 00:27:09,020 No one will know. 270 00:27:12,430 --> 00:27:14,030 It's going to be so tasty. 271 00:27:14,030 --> 00:27:16,100 That's perfect. 272 00:27:16,100 --> 00:27:18,600 Here we are. Now we cut them out. 273 00:27:25,970 --> 00:27:28,910 - Nigel... - Mmm-hmm? 274 00:27:32,010 --> 00:27:35,150 - I love you. - I love you too, Mum. 275 00:27:41,190 --> 00:27:44,330 - Now all we need is the mincemeat. - I'll get it. 276 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:59,410 - I can't see it. - It's in there somewhere, Nigel, I know it's in there somewhere. 277 00:27:59,410 --> 00:28:01,010 Don't worry. I'll find it. 278 00:28:08,950 --> 00:28:11,590 I don't understand. It must be in there somewhere. 279 00:28:13,590 --> 00:28:17,660 - It has to be here. I'm sure it's here. - It's not. 280 00:28:17,660 --> 00:28:18,890 Let me see. 281 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,130 I asked your father specially. 282 00:28:27,470 --> 00:28:28,970 I'm sorry, Nigel. 283 00:28:31,170 --> 00:28:32,670 You said you'd teach me. 284 00:28:32,670 --> 00:28:34,440 Well... 285 00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:36,310 We'll put them in the fridge 286 00:28:36,310 --> 00:28:40,020 and we'll get some tomorrow from Percy Salt's. But you promised! 287 00:28:40,020 --> 00:28:43,050 You're going to leave me with him, aren't you? 288 00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:47,490 - It's not fair! - Nigel... 289 00:28:47,490 --> 00:28:48,720 Come here... 290 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:51,390 - I hate you! - Come here, come here. 291 00:28:51,390 --> 00:28:53,100 All right. You're hopeless! 292 00:28:53,100 --> 00:28:54,730 I hope you die! 293 00:29:06,140 --> 00:29:10,310 All right, all right, all right. 294 00:29:10,310 --> 00:29:12,010 Shh. 295 00:29:16,350 --> 00:29:17,850 Shhh. 296 00:29:23,530 --> 00:29:26,900 All right. 297 00:29:37,140 --> 00:29:42,910 - What's that? - It's a stocking, Nigel. - But there's still a month to go. 298 00:29:42,910 --> 00:29:47,350 We thought we'd give you your presents early this year. As a special treat. 299 00:29:47,350 --> 00:29:49,790 We thought we'd open them in the morning. 300 00:29:49,790 --> 00:29:53,490 I don't want them in the morning. It'll spoil Christmas. 301 00:29:53,490 --> 00:29:54,520 Nigel, please! 302 00:29:58,590 --> 00:30:00,700 Your mother asked me specially. 303 00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:06,370 OK. I suppose so. 304 00:30:08,100 --> 00:30:10,510 So, you're not going to tell me off, then? 305 00:30:10,510 --> 00:30:14,110 No, I'm not going to tell you off. 306 00:30:14,110 --> 00:30:16,880 But you mustn't open them until Mum is there. 307 00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:20,880 Night-night. 308 00:30:20,880 --> 00:30:21,950 Night-night. 309 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:46,100 Daddy? 310 00:33:41,350 --> 00:33:45,390 'With Mum gone, things in the culinary department did not get any better, 311 00:33:45,390 --> 00:33:50,690 'and after months of cheese on toast, Dad decided to be more adventurous.' 312 00:33:56,070 --> 00:33:57,100 Ah! 313 00:34:03,010 --> 00:34:04,340 Ahh! 314 00:34:06,940 --> 00:34:09,450 Damn it! 315 00:34:09,450 --> 00:34:11,010 Ah. 316 00:34:11,010 --> 00:34:12,210 Oh! Ow! 317 00:34:18,190 --> 00:34:20,760 It's disgusting. 318 00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:23,360 - You haven't even tried it. - It's not even cooked. 319 00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:28,560 Look, Nigel, just eat it. 320 00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:33,400 There are kids in Biafra who'd give their right arm for a Fray Bentos pie. 321 00:34:41,810 --> 00:34:44,350 - Eat your pie. - No. 322 00:34:46,220 --> 00:34:49,350 - Eat your pie, Nigel. - I won't. 323 00:34:50,850 --> 00:34:53,490 I'm warning you. 324 00:35:14,980 --> 00:35:17,650 - No! - That's it! 325 00:35:17,650 --> 00:35:19,650 - Eat the bloody pie! - No! 326 00:35:19,650 --> 00:35:21,220 - Eat it! - No! - Eat the pie! - No! 327 00:35:38,530 --> 00:35:42,670 - Maybe it's supposed to be like that. - Warrel, it was completely raw! 328 00:35:42,670 --> 00:35:44,310 Don't worry about it. 329 00:35:44,310 --> 00:35:46,940 My mum's no great shakes in the kitchen either. 330 00:35:46,940 --> 00:35:51,310 At least she's not dead. I wish I came from a normal family. 331 00:35:51,310 --> 00:35:54,550 Nigel, normal families are totally overrated. 332 00:35:54,550 --> 00:35:56,950 You'll probably grow up to be interesting. 333 00:35:56,950 --> 00:35:59,220 I don't want to be interesting. 334 00:35:59,220 --> 00:36:01,820 I just want him to like me. 335 00:36:02,890 --> 00:36:05,190 If you want to soften him up a bit, 336 00:36:05,190 --> 00:36:08,600 you can't expect something for nothing. 337 00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:13,800 Remember, the way to a man's heart is always through his stomach. 338 00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:15,970 Really? I'm telling you. 339 00:36:15,970 --> 00:36:19,810 My dad's putty in Mum's fingers once he's had his toad-in-the-hole. 340 00:36:30,720 --> 00:36:34,360 - Ah, now, there you go, this is for you. - Thank you. 341 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:36,230 That's for me. Thank you very much. 342 00:36:36,230 --> 00:36:38,530 Now then, can I help you, son? 343 00:36:38,530 --> 00:36:42,560 I'll have two pieces of smoked haddock, please. It's my dad's favourite. 344 00:36:42,560 --> 00:36:47,470 - Don't you want something for your mum? - She's dead. - OK. 345 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,410 That'll be two and six, sunshine. 346 00:36:53,940 --> 00:36:56,110 I've only got this. 347 00:36:56,110 --> 00:36:57,880 Could you cut a bit off, please. 348 00:36:57,880 --> 00:37:00,480 It's all right, son; you can have the tail bit on me. 349 00:37:02,180 --> 00:37:05,250 Um... How do you cook it? 350 00:37:05,250 --> 00:37:06,720 Warm the grill first. 351 00:37:06,720 --> 00:37:10,860 Rub it with a bit of butter and put it on just before you're going to eat. 352 00:37:10,860 --> 00:37:13,760 - Ten minutes, absolute max, understood? - Thank you. 353 00:38:25,270 --> 00:38:28,800 - Where have you been? - Nowhere. 354 00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:33,180 Just got a little detained at the factory, Nigel. 355 00:38:39,650 --> 00:38:42,650 - Did you cook this? - It's ruined. 356 00:38:55,860 --> 00:38:57,970 No, it's not. 357 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:01,940 It's just how I like it. 358 00:39:01,940 --> 00:39:03,510 No, it isn't. It's bad. 359 00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:09,310 Mmm. Look, Dad, you don't have to eat it. 360 00:39:09,310 --> 00:39:11,650 No, really, Nigel. 361 00:39:11,650 --> 00:39:13,620 It's delicious. 362 00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:22,420 'You see, I told you it'd win him over.' 363 00:39:22,420 --> 00:39:25,360 Haddock's a very superior fish, Nigel. 364 00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:30,070 - I really don't think he liked it. - It takes some time, bonding. 365 00:39:30,070 --> 00:39:31,870 Especially now your mum's dead. 366 00:39:31,870 --> 00:39:35,240 I'm telling you, you'll be inseparable shortly. 367 00:39:35,240 --> 00:39:37,340 Nothing will get between yous. 368 00:39:46,620 --> 00:39:48,220 Slater! 369 00:39:49,490 --> 00:39:51,190 Where is your milk? 370 00:39:52,490 --> 00:39:54,820 Come out to the front. 371 00:40:00,960 --> 00:40:03,400 Where is your milk? 372 00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:05,400 I drank it, Miss. 373 00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:07,270 No, you did not. 374 00:40:07,270 --> 00:40:12,640 I've watched you give it to Leonard Watson every day this week. I want you to drink it now. 375 00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:18,680 I have to warn you, Miss, I have a serious aversion to dairy products. 376 00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:23,390 Drink it now, Slater! It's good for you! 377 00:40:23,390 --> 00:40:24,650 OK, then. 378 00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:39,230 You see? It wasn't that bad. 379 00:40:52,550 --> 00:40:54,450 Sit down. 380 00:40:58,990 --> 00:41:01,420 Nice one, Slater. 381 00:41:08,060 --> 00:41:10,900 Bleedin' hell. I'll be all afternoon on this. 382 00:41:13,700 --> 00:41:18,810 - What a bloody awful state this is in. When was the last time you cleaned in here? - Who are you? 383 00:41:18,810 --> 00:41:22,980 Hmm? New cleaner. Who's it bleedin' well look like? Joan of Arc? 384 00:41:22,980 --> 00:41:26,850 Whoever cleaned inside of here made a right pig's ear of it. 385 00:41:29,350 --> 00:41:31,020 Does my dad know you're here? 386 00:41:31,020 --> 00:41:36,030 No, I broke in and thought I'd scrub the kitchen floor clean! Bugger off! 387 00:41:36,030 --> 00:41:39,830 I ain't got all day to stand round talking to you. Snotty little brat. 388 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:49,840 Bugger. I'll be on me knees all night getting this off. 389 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:51,770 Mrs Potter. 390 00:41:51,770 --> 00:41:55,140 - Hmm? - Oh! You're still here. 391 00:41:55,140 --> 00:41:57,350 Oh, Mr Slater. 392 00:41:57,350 --> 00:41:59,680 I thought you was out at work at this time. 393 00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:02,650 - I see you've met Nigel. - Oh, yes. 394 00:42:02,650 --> 00:42:07,490 I think we're going to get along like a house on fire, aren't we, Nige? 395 00:42:07,490 --> 00:42:09,760 'I didn't expect Mrs Potter to last long. 396 00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:15,360 'My father wasn't usually one to associate himself with people who wore Crimplene. 397 00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:19,070 'But I was soon to be proved wrong.' 398 00:43:39,780 --> 00:43:46,060 'And so it was, Mrs Potter became a regular part of my father's routine. 399 00:43:46,060 --> 00:43:50,230 'She scrubbed, polished and bleached her way into our lives.' 400 00:43:54,060 --> 00:43:58,200 - Are you still here? - No. 401 00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:00,600 I'm at home, doing me ironing! 402 00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:04,270 - What ARE you doing? - I'm darning your father's socks. 403 00:44:04,270 --> 00:44:08,240 - What are you doing that for? - They have holes in them. 404 00:44:08,240 --> 00:44:10,550 You're only supposed to do the cleaning. 405 00:44:10,550 --> 00:44:13,820 Where would we be if we only did what we were supposed to do? 406 00:44:13,820 --> 00:44:16,620 I thought you'd be pleased I'm looking after him. 407 00:44:16,620 --> 00:44:19,090 I know what you're up to, so just... off his socks. 408 00:44:19,090 --> 00:44:22,390 Listen, Nigel. 409 00:44:22,390 --> 00:44:26,530 Look, I know you miss your mother and everything, but if there's a hole, 410 00:44:26,530 --> 00:44:31,630 sweetheart, somebody is going to darn it, and it might as well be me. 411 00:44:31,630 --> 00:44:36,270 You're wasting your time. I mean, you're far too common, and anyway, you're married. 412 00:44:36,270 --> 00:44:38,810 All I'm doing is darning his socks! 413 00:44:38,810 --> 00:44:41,010 Anyway, it's got nothing to do with you. 414 00:44:41,010 --> 00:44:45,950 Just because you can sew up his clothes doesn't mean you're anything like my mother! 415 00:44:45,950 --> 00:44:50,120 - Forget it! He's never going to be interested in you! - Ah, Mrs Potter. 416 00:44:50,120 --> 00:44:55,560 - You're here rather late again. - That's all right, Alan. I just thought I'd do your socks for you. 417 00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:57,260 Oh, really, you shouldn't have. 418 00:44:57,260 --> 00:44:58,890 That's beyond the call. 419 00:44:58,890 --> 00:45:00,900 Oh, it's nothing, you know. 420 00:45:00,900 --> 00:45:03,430 Got to keep your toes warm! 421 00:45:03,430 --> 00:45:08,670 Oh, by the way, baked you a little something for your supper. 422 00:45:08,670 --> 00:45:11,010 Oh, really, Mrs Potter! 423 00:45:11,010 --> 00:45:15,180 - It's an apple pie! - Well, I just thought you boys need a bit of looking after. 424 00:45:15,180 --> 00:45:16,880 Oh, that's very kind. 425 00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:18,610 Isn't it, Nigel? 426 00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:24,350 - Oh, that smells delicious. - Oh, it's just something I knocked up. 427 00:45:24,350 --> 00:45:27,160 Anyway, must be going. 428 00:45:27,160 --> 00:45:29,890 Here, that'll stop you sticking through. 429 00:45:31,330 --> 00:45:35,260 - Maybe I could offer you a lift home. - Aren't you going to eat the pie? 430 00:45:35,260 --> 00:45:39,440 Well actually, you should probably let it cool. Don't want to burn your lips, do you? 431 00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:42,670 No, it's no bother. I'll get the bus. 432 00:45:42,670 --> 00:45:46,240 No, really, really, it's the least I can do. 433 00:45:46,240 --> 00:45:48,810 Oh, well, if you insist. 434 00:45:48,810 --> 00:45:51,210 You'll be right, Nigel, won't you? 435 00:45:53,480 --> 00:45:55,680 See you, flower. 436 00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:57,890 I won't be long. 437 00:45:57,890 --> 00:45:59,860 Let me get the door. Thank you. 438 00:46:15,500 --> 00:46:18,810 'there's no denying Mrs Potter made a decent apple pie. 439 00:46:18,810 --> 00:46:21,310 'In fact, it was better than decent. 440 00:46:21,310 --> 00:46:25,480 'It was sublime, and one of the most glorious things I'd ever put in my mouth.' 441 00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:38,590 - What's the matter? - You're wearing my mum's apron! 442 00:46:38,590 --> 00:46:41,860 What do you want me to wear? An evening gown? 443 00:46:41,860 --> 00:46:46,600 - Would you like to help me bake a cake? - You shouldn't be wearing it. It's not yours. 444 00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:48,470 All right! 445 00:46:48,470 --> 00:46:50,640 Keep your hair on, bugger-lugs. 446 00:46:50,640 --> 00:46:52,410 It's only an apron. 447 00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:57,710 Does your husband know that you're cooking our suppers? 448 00:46:57,710 --> 00:47:01,120 Look, don't patronise me, son. 449 00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:05,250 Just because I don't talk all bay-window, doesn't mean I'm a fool, you know. 450 00:47:05,250 --> 00:47:09,560 You're a child. You know nothing about what people go through. 451 00:47:17,570 --> 00:47:19,230 Here's the apron. 452 00:47:19,230 --> 00:47:23,270 Wouldn't have thought you were so sentimental about it, 453 00:47:23,270 --> 00:47:24,840 from what I've heard of her cooking. 454 00:47:31,510 --> 00:47:33,550 You'll have to put yourself to bed. 455 00:47:33,550 --> 00:47:36,850 - Where are you going? - Out! 456 00:47:36,850 --> 00:47:38,690 You're going with her, aren't you? 457 00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:43,690 It's just to a whist drive. 458 00:47:43,690 --> 00:47:46,830 - I have to have some life of my own. - With Mrs Potter? 459 00:47:49,870 --> 00:47:52,470 It's just a social occasion. 460 00:47:52,470 --> 00:47:54,840 Please, Dad, don't leave me on my own. 461 00:47:57,240 --> 00:47:59,440 You'll be fine, Nigel. 462 00:50:38,900 --> 00:50:40,700 'Hello. 463 00:50:42,340 --> 00:50:47,280 'Joan, is that you? Is Joan Potter there?' 464 00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:19,130 - I don't see why she has to come. - Look, there's nothing wrong with me inviting Mrs Potter. 465 00:52:19,130 --> 00:52:21,640 This is the Masonic event of the season. 466 00:52:21,640 --> 00:52:23,310 Dad, she's our cleaner. 467 00:52:23,310 --> 00:52:25,510 I mean, look where she lives. 468 00:52:25,510 --> 00:52:28,840 - Look, Joan has been very good to us. - She lives in a council house. 469 00:52:28,840 --> 00:52:32,610 - Where she lives is of no consequence. - It's not right. 470 00:52:32,610 --> 00:52:37,490 She should be inside with her husband, not coming out with us to Masonic dances. 471 00:52:37,490 --> 00:52:40,260 You're the one who didn't want to be left on their own! 472 00:52:40,260 --> 00:52:45,360 Now, you don't understand anything about Mrs Potter's personal arrangements. 473 00:52:45,360 --> 00:52:47,560 Anyway, she's got nothing to hide. 474 00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:49,430 She's a very respectable woman. 475 00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:52,870 Bugger, bugger, bugger. 476 00:52:54,770 --> 00:52:57,170 Bleedin' duck. 477 00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:14,860 I've laddered me tights on that bleedin' wall. Bugger. 478 00:53:14,860 --> 00:53:18,590 Come on, darling. Let's get a move on before anyone clocks us. 479 00:53:20,360 --> 00:53:23,600 - Oh, hello, Nigel. - Hello. - Well, how lovely. 480 00:53:23,600 --> 00:53:25,730 The three of us all together. 481 00:53:41,620 --> 00:53:45,690 Hello. Have you met Joan? Joan Potter. Ruby Sturridge. 482 00:53:45,690 --> 00:53:47,890 - Nice to meet you. - She's our cleaner. 483 00:53:47,890 --> 00:53:49,260 Oh. 484 00:53:58,800 --> 00:54:00,270 Oh, yes. 485 00:54:00,270 --> 00:54:02,840 I find Vim a very superior scourer. 486 00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:07,610 Though I've been very impressed with the new version of Mr Sheen. Do you know of it? 487 00:54:07,610 --> 00:54:10,180 Don't you find aerosols so very convenient? 488 00:54:10,180 --> 00:54:12,980 Compared to Jif Cream they really are superb. 489 00:54:12,980 --> 00:54:16,550 I use bicarb on milk stains. Only thing that gets rid of the stench. 490 00:54:16,550 --> 00:54:19,420 Nothing worse than curdled milk sweating away in the carpets. 491 00:54:19,420 --> 00:54:23,860 No. Trust me, you've got a spillage, bicarb is the way to go. 492 00:54:23,860 --> 00:54:26,430 Joan, do eat. 493 00:54:26,430 --> 00:54:28,730 - No, watching me weight. - Can I have yours? 494 00:54:42,010 --> 00:54:47,150 Yes, we were at Alderman Cartwright's for a function, only recently. 495 00:54:47,150 --> 00:54:51,590 Oh, yes? I know the person that cleans for him, of course. 496 00:54:51,590 --> 00:54:54,360 Not great personal hygiene... 497 00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:56,560 or so they tell me. 498 00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,990 Very rarely cleans his windows. 499 00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,100 Oh, Brian. Excuse me. 500 00:55:03,100 --> 00:55:05,030 I do mine meself, of course. 501 00:55:05,030 --> 00:55:09,510 Can't beat a chamois leather. Never be without my Windolene. 502 00:55:09,510 --> 00:55:14,580 - Do you have a favourite disinfectant, Mrs Sturridge? - I can't say I know. 503 00:55:14,580 --> 00:55:18,280 I'd have to ask Mrs Miller, our housekeeper. 504 00:55:18,280 --> 00:55:21,180 Oh. 505 00:55:21,180 --> 00:55:23,850 You might want to ask her to take a look at that stain. 506 00:55:23,850 --> 00:55:27,660 - Although not much is going to get that out. - Oh, bugger! 507 00:55:28,890 --> 00:55:30,560 Would you like to dance? 508 00:55:30,560 --> 00:55:32,430 I'd love to. Come on. 509 00:55:32,430 --> 00:55:33,800 Hang on. 510 00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:38,770 Bit of Dutch. 511 00:55:38,770 --> 00:55:40,400 Won't be long. 512 00:55:56,520 --> 00:55:59,190 He must pay very good overtime. 513 00:56:01,060 --> 00:56:05,560 Do you know, I've never seen your Dad dance before. 514 00:56:05,560 --> 00:56:09,870 - That's probably a blessing. - Do you think I should try and stop them? 515 00:56:09,870 --> 00:56:11,630 There's very little you can do. 516 00:56:11,630 --> 00:56:15,770 She might be common, but there's nothing she doesn't know about cleaning products. 517 00:56:15,770 --> 00:56:19,010 If I was you, I'd just try to enjoy the food. 518 00:56:43,300 --> 00:56:46,200 Mind you, they had lovely flowers in the ladies loo. 519 00:56:47,940 --> 00:56:50,910 I think it was to cover the smell of the urinals. 520 00:56:50,910 --> 00:56:53,510 But what a fantastic time, eh? 521 00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:57,550 Thanks for coming, Joan. 522 00:56:57,550 --> 00:57:00,280 No, thank you. 523 00:57:04,190 --> 00:57:06,720 Is this all right for you here? 524 00:57:06,720 --> 00:57:10,590 Yeah. Best be on the safe side. 525 00:57:10,590 --> 00:57:15,930 See you, flower. Are you all right, love? 526 00:57:15,930 --> 00:57:18,930 I'm fine. Please, just go home, Mrs Potter. 527 00:57:18,930 --> 00:57:22,770 Yeah, I will. I'll go home. 528 00:57:35,480 --> 00:57:37,690 Would you get in the front now, Nigel? 529 00:57:41,820 --> 00:57:44,030 What do you think of Joan, then, Nigel? 530 00:57:44,030 --> 00:57:46,560 Mrs Potter? 531 00:57:46,560 --> 00:57:50,400 I think in some ways she's quite like your mother. 532 00:57:50,400 --> 00:57:53,070 She's nothing like my mother. 533 00:57:55,140 --> 00:57:56,770 Look, Nigel... 534 00:57:58,510 --> 00:58:00,610 I loved your mother. 535 00:58:00,610 --> 00:58:04,510 And I will always love your mother. 536 00:58:04,510 --> 00:58:06,720 But sometimes things change. 537 00:58:08,350 --> 00:58:09,850 Life moves on. 538 00:58:11,690 --> 00:58:16,490 - We have to accept that. - I don't mind change. 539 00:58:16,490 --> 00:58:20,060 I don't mind moving on. I just don't like Mrs Potter. 540 00:58:20,060 --> 00:58:22,400 Give her a chance. 541 00:58:22,400 --> 00:58:25,470 You don't know what it's like on those estates. 542 00:58:30,970 --> 00:58:33,810 I don't care where she comes from. 543 00:58:33,810 --> 00:58:35,480 I just hate her. 544 00:58:35,480 --> 00:58:37,110 I just... 545 00:58:39,950 --> 00:58:43,520 Oh, for Pete's sake. 546 00:58:48,190 --> 00:58:50,490 Oh! 547 00:59:00,700 --> 00:59:02,770 She was dancing with your Dad? 548 00:59:02,770 --> 00:59:06,110 - I think she'd have been kissing him if I hadn't been there. - Urgh. 549 00:59:06,110 --> 00:59:09,010 Maybe it's just a phase, cos he's upset about your mum. 550 00:59:09,010 --> 00:59:14,720 I don't even think he thinks about her any more. Plus, she's a brilliant cook. 551 00:59:14,720 --> 00:59:16,320 I wouldn't worry about it. 552 00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:22,490 - Her husband will find out, thump your Dad and get another cleaner. - You reckon? 553 00:59:22,490 --> 00:59:24,490 That's what happened to Uncle Harry. 554 00:59:24,490 --> 00:59:28,630 - So, you don't think it's serious, then? - Don't be stupid. 555 00:59:28,630 --> 00:59:31,230 You've got absolutely nothing to worry about. 556 00:59:31,230 --> 00:59:34,570 Come on, Nigel! 557 00:59:34,570 --> 00:59:36,610 Where are we going? 558 00:59:36,610 --> 00:59:38,310 You'll see. 559 00:59:38,310 --> 00:59:39,680 It's a surprise. 560 00:59:57,360 --> 01:00:02,530 Nigel, I know it's been difficult since your mum died, 561 01:00:02,530 --> 01:00:05,970 but you've been very patient, 562 01:00:05,970 --> 01:00:08,070 haven't you? - Are we nearly there yet? 563 01:00:08,070 --> 01:00:10,140 And it's just, I've been thinking... 564 01:00:12,410 --> 01:00:17,680 ..it might be better for all of us if we made a new start of everything. 565 01:00:17,680 --> 01:00:20,280 What do you mean, "a new start"? 566 01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:25,820 Well, it's just... since your mum died, 567 01:00:25,820 --> 01:00:29,760 everything got off on the wrong footing. 568 01:00:29,760 --> 01:00:33,800 - That's all. - So we can get a new cleaner? 569 01:00:33,800 --> 01:00:36,530 No, no, we don't need a new cleaner. 570 01:00:38,200 --> 01:00:42,670 Joan is not the... Mrs Potter is not the problem here. 571 01:01:01,360 --> 01:01:03,230 Is this it? 572 01:01:04,660 --> 01:01:06,200 It's beautiful, isn't it? 573 01:01:07,860 --> 01:01:11,530 Imagine living here. No neighbours. 574 01:01:11,530 --> 01:01:15,900 Perfect seclusion. Wonderful country views. 575 01:01:15,900 --> 01:01:20,240 - Dad, what's going on? - Nothing, nothing. Only saying. 576 01:01:20,240 --> 01:01:24,350 - It's got a septic tank and everything. - Dad, who lives here? 577 01:01:25,810 --> 01:01:27,820 Well, actually... 578 01:01:27,820 --> 01:01:29,450 we do. 579 01:01:29,450 --> 01:01:33,020 What do you mean?! All the stuff's coming this afternoon. 580 01:01:33,020 --> 01:01:35,820 But what about school? What about Warrel? 581 01:01:35,820 --> 01:01:39,430 - I mean, it's miles from anywhere. - You'll get used to it, Nigel. 582 01:01:39,430 --> 01:01:43,230 I don't want to get used to it. We can't move here. 583 01:01:43,230 --> 01:01:47,140 - What about Mrs Potter? - Look, everything's going to be all right, Nigel. 584 01:01:47,140 --> 01:01:49,610 It's not the end of the world. 585 01:01:49,610 --> 01:01:52,740 What could possibly be worse than moving here? 586 01:01:52,740 --> 01:01:55,680 Ah! Nigel! Woo-hoo! 587 01:01:55,680 --> 01:01:56,950 Sweetie! 588 01:01:56,950 --> 01:01:58,810 Say hello to your Auntie Joan. 589 01:01:58,810 --> 01:02:01,120 You can call me Joanie, if you like. 590 01:02:11,760 --> 01:02:13,400 Agh! 591 01:02:13,400 --> 01:02:16,200 I knew it was a bad idea not to tell him. 592 01:02:17,800 --> 01:02:19,700 I'll deal with this. 593 01:02:54,300 --> 01:02:58,270 Look, I know this is all a bit of a shock for you. 594 01:02:58,270 --> 01:03:00,480 I know it's very hard. 595 01:03:00,480 --> 01:03:02,240 I can never replace your mother. 596 01:03:07,820 --> 01:03:11,120 But I know what it feels like to be alone. 597 01:03:15,220 --> 01:03:17,830 I'm not your enemy, Nigel. 598 01:03:17,830 --> 01:03:21,860 I want to put all that bad feeling behind us, 599 01:03:21,860 --> 01:03:24,730 make a fresh start here, 600 01:03:24,730 --> 01:03:26,470 the three of us. 601 01:03:30,470 --> 01:03:32,740 Mmm? 602 01:03:32,740 --> 01:03:34,340 Give us a chance here. 603 01:03:36,150 --> 01:03:38,310 Come on. 604 01:03:38,310 --> 01:03:41,020 We can make this work. 605 01:03:41,020 --> 01:03:42,380 Together. 606 01:03:44,550 --> 01:03:47,920 No! You're our cleaner, for God's sake, just go back to Wolverhampton! 607 01:03:47,920 --> 01:03:51,530 Now, you listen here, you spoilt little brat, 608 01:03:51,530 --> 01:03:55,730 I have given up everything to come here and look after you, all right? 609 01:03:55,730 --> 01:03:58,600 I will be lynched if I ever go back to Wolverhampton. 610 01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:00,600 So, let's cut the dogs doo-da, hey? 611 01:04:00,600 --> 01:04:03,510 You're just going to have to sodding well get used to it, 612 01:04:03,510 --> 01:04:07,340 or I'll make your every waking hour a complete blinking misery! Capiche? 613 01:04:07,340 --> 01:04:09,180 Everything all right? 614 01:04:09,180 --> 01:04:13,350 Yeah! Course, darling! 615 01:04:16,820 --> 01:04:19,660 I think we've sorted everything out, haven't we, Nigel? 616 01:04:35,070 --> 01:04:39,140 She may not be your mother, Nigel, but she's a bloomin' good cook. 617 01:04:39,140 --> 01:04:43,080 Well, as they used to say in Wolverhampton, bon appeti-ti! 618 01:04:53,390 --> 01:04:56,260 Well, as they used to say in Wolverhampton, bon appeti-ti! 619 01:05:14,440 --> 01:05:17,010 All done? 620 01:05:17,010 --> 01:05:20,280 That was absolutely delicious, darling. 621 01:05:21,720 --> 01:05:24,150 Nigel, help Joan with the dishes. 622 01:05:24,150 --> 01:05:28,760 - I've got a book to finish for school. - No buts, Nigel, give Joan a hand. 623 01:05:43,170 --> 01:05:47,940 - Oh, Nigel Slater, nice bag! - Give it back! 624 01:05:47,940 --> 01:05:51,980 Now, as it's the start of a new term, you all need to pick one option. 625 01:05:54,520 --> 01:05:56,720 Slater, pay attention. 626 01:05:56,720 --> 01:05:59,190 Now, hands up for woodwork. 627 01:06:02,690 --> 01:06:04,730 Home economics. 628 01:06:10,900 --> 01:06:13,400 Are you serious? 629 01:06:15,670 --> 01:06:22,280 Ah, are you going to have them later with your mummy and daddy? 630 01:07:08,560 --> 01:07:10,690 Oh, hello, Nigel. 631 01:07:10,690 --> 01:07:13,700 - What are you doing in there? - Nothing. 632 01:07:21,200 --> 01:07:22,940 Absolutely delicious. 633 01:07:22,940 --> 01:07:26,180 - What's for afters? - How about a scone? 634 01:07:26,180 --> 01:07:28,410 A scone? 635 01:07:28,410 --> 01:07:30,350 And a nice cup of tea? 636 01:07:30,350 --> 01:07:32,110 Is he OK? 637 01:07:34,680 --> 01:07:39,390 - Where the hell did they come from? - Made them, earlier. 638 01:07:39,390 --> 01:07:41,760 What do you mean, you made them, earlier? 639 01:07:41,760 --> 01:07:45,890 At school. Taste one. But I've made a gooseberry fool. 640 01:07:45,890 --> 01:07:47,060 I'm sure it'll keep. 641 01:08:00,410 --> 01:08:02,340 Actually, they're not half bad, Nigel. 642 01:08:06,950 --> 01:08:09,280 Excellent effort. 643 01:08:09,280 --> 01:08:13,390 Does this mean you'll be doing the cooking every Wednesday from now on? 644 01:08:13,390 --> 01:08:16,090 Yes. It does, actually. 645 01:08:19,090 --> 01:08:23,730 Well done, Nigel. Mmm! 646 01:08:23,730 --> 01:08:28,600 Yeah, well done, son. 647 01:08:28,600 --> 01:08:30,740 Well done. 648 01:08:37,780 --> 01:08:41,620 Oh, very good work, Nigel! 649 01:08:41,620 --> 01:08:46,090 Oh, dear, that's very sloppy, I'm afraid. Now, this is why we should have put... 650 01:08:59,640 --> 01:09:03,410 What's all this? It's a Wednesday, I've made a shepherd's pie. 651 01:09:03,410 --> 01:09:07,580 Oh, I'm sorry, love, completely forgot. Oh, well, never mind. 652 01:09:07,580 --> 01:09:10,380 Mmm, looks delicious, darling. 653 01:09:10,380 --> 01:09:15,020 Pop it in the fridge. I'm sure it'll keep, sweetheart. 654 01:09:45,280 --> 01:09:47,350 Oh, hello, Nigel. I've made a trifle. 655 01:09:47,350 --> 01:09:48,880 Oh, Nigel, we ate early. 656 01:09:48,880 --> 01:09:51,890 Yeah, but there's some lemon meringue on the side there. 657 01:09:51,890 --> 01:09:54,820 That was the best lemon meringue pie I have ever tasted. 658 01:09:54,820 --> 01:09:58,260 Oh, thank you, I'll have to make it on a regular basis! 659 01:10:33,360 --> 01:10:37,730 That's the best lemon meringue you've ever tasted. 660 01:10:37,730 --> 01:10:40,970 That's the best lemon meringue anybody's ever tasted. 661 01:10:42,640 --> 01:10:45,140 If I was you, son, I'd give up. 662 01:10:46,810 --> 01:10:48,910 You'll never even be in the vicinity. 663 01:10:50,980 --> 01:10:53,450 What did you put in there to make it so fluffy? 664 01:10:55,990 --> 01:11:01,220 If you want to make a lemon meringue, sunshine, you're going to have to get your own recipe. 665 01:11:36,430 --> 01:11:39,360 You really have to go home now, Nigel. 666 01:12:10,890 --> 01:12:13,460 Don't you have some homework to do? 667 01:12:20,100 --> 01:12:24,010 Bugger off. More creamed potato? 668 01:12:24,010 --> 01:12:26,840 No, sweetheart, I'm s... I'm stuffed. 669 01:12:26,840 --> 01:12:30,080 I spent all afternoon on this. 670 01:12:30,080 --> 01:12:34,220 Erm, all right, then just a little bit. 671 01:12:47,700 --> 01:12:50,730 Oh, I made your favourite for afters - lemon meringue pie. 672 01:13:35,080 --> 01:13:36,950 Dad. What's that? 673 01:13:36,950 --> 01:13:38,650 - It's a lemon meringue. - What? 674 01:13:38,650 --> 01:13:40,280 I made it for you specially. 675 01:13:40,280 --> 01:13:42,620 - What for? - To eat. For a snack. 676 01:13:42,620 --> 01:13:45,390 I don't want a snack, we just had our tea. 677 01:13:45,390 --> 01:13:47,890 But I thought you loved lemon meringue pie. 678 01:13:47,890 --> 01:13:51,930 - I couldn't eat anything now. - Anyway, I've got a Victoria sponge I made earlier. 679 01:13:53,530 --> 01:13:56,800 But it's freshly baked, Dad. 680 01:13:56,800 --> 01:14:01,800 Nigel, look, I appreciate the effort but I'm not even remotely hungry. 681 01:14:01,800 --> 01:14:05,980 - Just try it. No! - I know that you'll like it. - Nigel, please. 682 01:14:05,980 --> 01:14:07,340 Take it away. 683 01:14:44,550 --> 01:14:46,650 That's my recipe. 684 01:14:46,650 --> 01:14:48,280 You bleeding well stole this. 685 01:14:48,280 --> 01:14:51,650 No, I didn't. I invented that myself. 686 01:14:51,650 --> 01:14:53,390 Mine's even got peel in it. 687 01:14:53,390 --> 01:14:56,390 I cook for you, I clean for you, 688 01:14:56,390 --> 01:15:01,030 I look after your every bleeding need and this is how you repay me? 689 01:15:01,030 --> 01:15:04,030 Get off my patch, matey, 690 01:15:04,030 --> 01:15:09,270 cos I do the lemon meringues around here, you ungrateful little turd. 691 01:15:09,270 --> 01:15:12,470 I think you're getting this out of perspective. 692 01:15:12,470 --> 01:15:16,350 - He didn't even try any. - Perspective? I'll give you a bleeding perspective. 693 01:15:18,050 --> 01:15:20,050 And you can clean that up! 694 01:15:22,220 --> 01:15:24,850 What on earth did you say to her? 695 01:15:24,850 --> 01:15:27,690 I didn't say anything, she's mad. You have to get rid of her, Dad. 696 01:15:27,690 --> 01:15:30,390 I've asked Mrs Potter to marry me. 697 01:15:30,390 --> 01:15:32,760 - Marry you? - You're going to have to accept that. 698 01:15:32,760 --> 01:15:35,260 - Or? - Or we're going to have to put you into care. 699 01:15:38,700 --> 01:15:42,910 We can't go on like this. Joan... 700 01:16:00,660 --> 01:16:05,390 Thanks for the cake, Nigel. A lovely gesture. 701 01:16:07,600 --> 01:16:12,600 Yeah, it's really not that bad for a first attempt. 702 01:16:12,600 --> 01:16:14,240 Everybody loves the food. 703 01:16:14,240 --> 01:16:16,110 My meat puffs are going like hot cakes. 704 01:16:16,110 --> 01:16:18,470 Not much of a crowd. 705 01:16:18,470 --> 01:16:20,980 It's good that Sheila's shown up. 706 01:16:20,980 --> 01:16:23,380 Would you like a vol-au-vent? I made them myself. 707 01:16:23,380 --> 01:16:25,380 Are you all right, Dad? 708 01:16:25,380 --> 01:16:28,150 Yes, just a bit... tight that's all. 709 01:16:28,150 --> 01:16:32,660 Funny, it was all right at the fitting. Oh! 710 01:16:35,690 --> 01:16:38,190 Hey, you must be pleased to have a new mum. 711 01:16:38,190 --> 01:16:40,100 Not really. 712 01:16:40,100 --> 01:16:44,400 She might have a heart of ice, son, but she puts on a damn fine spread. 713 01:16:44,400 --> 01:16:47,740 Her husband's lost two stone since she moved out. 714 01:16:47,740 --> 01:16:49,270 That'll do for later. 715 01:16:55,180 --> 01:16:57,710 An absolute nightmare, 716 01:16:57,710 --> 01:17:01,550 but a bloody good baker, I think she could've been a professional. 717 01:17:01,550 --> 01:17:03,190 I made this, actually. 718 01:17:04,950 --> 01:17:08,590 Well. if it all gets too much, son, you can always go into catering. 719 01:17:15,700 --> 01:17:17,770 Wait, wait! No, no, no, no, no. 720 01:17:17,770 --> 01:17:22,100 What are you doing? No, Alan, no! 721 01:17:22,100 --> 01:17:24,010 No, you can't do that! 722 01:17:24,010 --> 01:17:25,770 No, come on, get up there. 723 01:17:27,310 --> 01:17:29,240 Let's get you up to the bedroom. 724 01:17:29,240 --> 01:17:33,380 That's where we can, you know, get your old pyjamas on. Good man. 725 01:17:33,380 --> 01:17:35,550 Come on, Mrs Slater. 726 01:17:39,660 --> 01:17:40,990 Come on! 727 01:17:40,990 --> 01:17:43,830 Come on, up we get. 728 01:18:33,080 --> 01:18:35,980 - 16? - I'm only looking for a Saturday job. 729 01:18:35,980 --> 01:18:38,810 I just want to get out of the house, really. 730 01:18:38,810 --> 01:18:43,690 I'm very good, honest. I've read the complete works of Marguerite Patten and everything. 731 01:18:46,920 --> 01:18:49,020 Duck a l'orange, 732 01:18:49,020 --> 01:18:54,430 boeuf bourguignon, veal cordon bleu, that's the most expensive. 733 01:18:54,430 --> 01:18:57,600 You can feel the duck because of the bones. 734 01:18:57,600 --> 01:19:01,400 This is sophisticated cooking, Nigel. 735 01:19:01,400 --> 01:19:04,570 So this is where the magic happens. 736 01:19:04,570 --> 01:19:06,610 Whack it up, bung it in, 20 minutes. 737 01:19:06,610 --> 01:19:10,450 Now, if it hasn't got a label on, just chuck it in anyway. 738 01:19:10,450 --> 01:19:15,350 Now, I know it all seems a bit complicated at first but you'll soon get the hang of it. 739 01:20:15,480 --> 01:20:17,550 Who was that? 740 01:20:17,550 --> 01:20:19,520 The owner's son from upstairs. 741 01:20:19,520 --> 01:20:25,150 You want to watch him. Apparently, he's training to be a ballerina. 742 01:20:42,270 --> 01:20:45,340 - Really, I can't eat these. - I just cooked them. 743 01:20:45,340 --> 01:20:47,440 Well, we just had supper an hour ago. 744 01:20:47,440 --> 01:20:50,380 Just leave them there. You might get peckish. 745 01:20:55,220 --> 01:20:58,190 Oh, please, try to relax, dear. 746 01:21:11,300 --> 01:21:14,740 - What are you doing? - Oh nothing, just watch the telly, don't mind me. 747 01:21:14,740 --> 01:21:16,240 Where have you been? 748 01:21:16,240 --> 01:21:18,410 Nowhere. Out with some mates. 749 01:21:18,410 --> 01:21:21,340 You haven't got any mates. 750 01:21:21,340 --> 01:21:23,880 I got a part time job helping out at the Green Dragon. 751 01:21:23,880 --> 01:21:26,820 - What, the pub with the restaurant? - Just on Saturdays. 752 01:21:29,120 --> 01:21:32,220 - How much are they paying you? - She didn't say. 753 01:21:34,690 --> 01:21:38,160 I thought you'd be pleased I was out from under your feet for a bit. 754 01:21:38,160 --> 01:21:40,230 Uh-huh, yeah. 755 01:21:40,230 --> 01:21:42,360 No, you don't. 756 01:21:42,360 --> 01:21:45,600 Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I was born yesterday? 757 01:21:45,600 --> 01:21:47,970 I know what you're up to. 758 01:21:47,970 --> 01:21:51,510 Well, two can play at that game, sunshine. 759 01:21:51,510 --> 01:21:53,480 I'll give you boeuf bourguignon. 760 01:21:53,480 --> 01:21:56,710 Tomorrow, we'll have duck a l'orange or should it be coq au vin? 761 01:21:56,710 --> 01:21:59,950 And then some moules mariniere. Oh yeah, I can do foreign muck, as well. 762 01:21:59,950 --> 01:22:02,850 - And that's just for starters. - Joan! - I don't know what you're on about. 763 01:22:02,850 --> 01:22:06,590 Quiches, tortes, omelettes, seafood, souffles, the bleeding lot. 764 01:22:06,590 --> 01:22:08,690 In fact, I think I'll just rustle up a tarte tatin. 765 01:22:08,690 --> 01:22:11,590 That's a caramelised apple pie in case you're wondering! 766 01:22:11,590 --> 01:22:13,400 Just stop it! 767 01:22:13,400 --> 01:22:15,530 Enough is enough. 768 01:22:15,530 --> 01:22:18,900 Enough fighting, enough food. 769 01:22:21,440 --> 01:22:25,340 Will you just please try to get on? 770 01:22:27,980 --> 01:22:30,010 This is miserable. 771 01:22:45,560 --> 01:22:47,200 I'm sorry, Dad. 772 01:22:51,400 --> 01:22:53,940 Oh, just go away, Nigel. 773 01:23:32,440 --> 01:23:34,740 Are you all right? 774 01:23:34,740 --> 01:23:36,480 Er, yes. 775 01:23:36,480 --> 01:23:41,020 Yes... perfectly fine. 776 01:23:41,020 --> 01:23:43,550 Thanks very much. 777 01:23:43,550 --> 01:23:46,160 Thank you. 778 01:24:09,010 --> 01:24:11,180 Mavis! 779 01:24:11,180 --> 01:24:12,620 Hello? 780 01:24:15,850 --> 01:24:17,620 You're Nigel, aren't you? 781 01:24:17,620 --> 01:24:20,560 The Fanny Cradock of Knightswick Lane. 782 01:24:20,560 --> 01:24:23,490 Not any more. My dad stopped me coming. 783 01:24:23,490 --> 01:24:26,030 To be honest, I only came to get out of the house. 784 01:24:26,030 --> 01:24:30,770 - Though I think I'd like to be a cook eventually. - How come you know so much about it? 785 01:24:30,770 --> 01:24:31,930 I don't, really. 786 01:24:31,930 --> 01:24:35,440 My granny was French, I just picked a few things up on holiday. 787 01:24:35,440 --> 01:24:37,970 They've got a very good attitude, the French. 788 01:24:37,970 --> 01:24:40,910 - Like Marguerite Patten. - Marguerite Patten is from High Barnet. 789 01:24:40,910 --> 01:24:45,550 They follow their instincts. 790 01:24:45,550 --> 01:24:47,380 Let's get out of here. 791 01:24:47,380 --> 01:24:53,220 That's the trouble with everyone round here, they're all so hidebound. 792 01:24:53,220 --> 01:24:56,090 If you don't get out, you'll turn into your parents. 793 01:24:57,360 --> 01:24:59,090 How long have you lived here? 794 01:24:59,090 --> 01:25:02,870 A few years. We moved from Wolverhampton. 795 01:25:02,870 --> 01:25:06,200 Oh, the culinary capital of the Midlands! 796 01:25:06,200 --> 01:25:08,270 What made you want to be a chef? 797 01:25:08,270 --> 01:25:12,140 Don't know, really. I just like it. 798 01:25:12,140 --> 01:25:13,740 Somehow it feels quite natural. 799 01:25:13,740 --> 01:25:17,310 How did you know you wanted to be a ballet dancer? 800 01:25:17,310 --> 01:25:22,480 I don't. I only agreed to go down there so I could get away from them. 801 01:25:22,480 --> 01:25:24,720 So you don't want to be a ballet dancer? 802 01:25:24,720 --> 01:25:28,020 God, no. I don't have a clue what I want to be. 803 01:25:32,900 --> 01:25:36,700 - How the hell do you stand it here? - I don't have much choice. 804 01:25:38,230 --> 01:25:40,300 You've every choice in the world. 805 01:25:40,300 --> 01:25:45,840 You just got to be brave. You can be anything you want to be. 806 01:25:45,840 --> 01:25:50,380 - Do you think? - Sure. 807 01:25:50,380 --> 01:25:52,010 If you've got the nerve. 808 01:25:53,880 --> 01:25:56,320 You just have to be prepared to risk something. 809 01:26:25,350 --> 01:26:28,020 See? 810 01:26:28,020 --> 01:26:30,120 You can be anything you want to be. 811 01:26:31,920 --> 01:26:34,820 Come on, Elizabeth David, we better be getting back. 812 01:26:40,860 --> 01:26:42,230 Stuart! 813 01:26:44,430 --> 01:26:46,400 Wait! 814 01:26:50,470 --> 01:26:51,910 Stuart! 815 01:26:54,110 --> 01:26:55,280 - See you. - Come on! 816 01:26:56,450 --> 01:27:00,680 - Can I see you tomorrow? - Tough tits, big ears. 817 01:27:00,680 --> 01:27:04,790 I've got to be in White Lodge in the morning. What? Term starts on Monday. 818 01:27:04,790 --> 01:27:09,060 Come on! Don't worry, sweetheart, you'll find someone else to play with. 819 01:27:09,060 --> 01:27:12,060 Please. Don't leave me here alone. 820 01:27:18,200 --> 01:27:19,970 You'll be all right, Nige. 821 01:27:31,180 --> 01:27:34,350 - Who's that? - That's Nigel. He used to work in the restaurant. 822 01:27:47,760 --> 01:27:50,900 Dad?! Hello? 823 01:27:57,240 --> 01:28:00,280 I told him to leave it. I told him we'd get a gardener. 824 01:28:00,280 --> 01:28:03,350 I said leave it till next week. 825 01:28:05,480 --> 01:28:07,050 He hadn't even eaten properly. 826 01:28:07,050 --> 01:28:10,890 - What's happened? - I told him, Nigel. I told him. He just wouldn't listen. 827 01:28:10,890 --> 01:28:13,560 Mrs Potter, what's going on? 828 01:28:13,560 --> 01:28:15,090 He's gone. 829 01:28:15,090 --> 01:28:19,730 One minute he was there with the mower, and the next minute he wasn't. 830 01:28:19,730 --> 01:28:21,700 What do you mean "he's gone"? 831 01:28:23,930 --> 01:28:25,700 He's dead, darling. 832 01:28:29,100 --> 01:28:32,140 We're on our own now, son. 833 01:28:33,610 --> 01:28:35,080 Oh, my poor darling. 834 01:28:37,550 --> 01:28:40,880 Don't worry. I'll look after you. 835 01:28:40,880 --> 01:28:43,520 We're going to get through this together. 836 01:28:43,520 --> 01:28:45,690 We'll both cook together. 837 01:28:45,690 --> 01:28:48,260 Lovely, healthy dishes. 838 01:28:48,260 --> 01:28:53,360 We'll cook a lemon meringue. Every year. In commemoration. 839 01:29:07,910 --> 01:29:09,780 You did this. 840 01:29:56,030 --> 01:29:59,160 Nigel! Nigel! 841 01:30:02,970 --> 01:30:05,700 Nigel! Let me in! 842 01:30:08,670 --> 01:30:13,910 Please, Nigel! Open the door! Talk to me! Nigel! 843 01:30:17,150 --> 01:30:20,280 Nigel, come on, son! 844 01:30:20,280 --> 01:30:22,020 Let me in, love. 845 01:30:22,020 --> 01:30:25,720 Son, come on! 846 01:30:28,490 --> 01:30:32,700 - I brought you a cup of tea and a nice bit of cake. - I don't want it. 847 01:30:32,700 --> 01:30:37,230 And I don't have to have it. I don't want you in my life any more 848 01:30:37,230 --> 01:30:41,100 Aw, no, you're just upset. What you doing? 849 01:30:41,100 --> 01:30:43,840 Nigel. Talk to me, son. 850 01:30:43,840 --> 01:30:46,110 Talk to me! 851 01:30:47,440 --> 01:30:51,350 You won. I don't have to see you ever again. 852 01:30:52,680 --> 01:30:55,180 - I'm your mother! - You're nobody. 853 01:30:57,390 --> 01:30:59,660 No, wait! Stop! 854 01:31:01,220 --> 01:31:06,530 You're too young! I'm ordering you! Nigel! Slater! Stop this right now! 855 01:31:06,530 --> 01:31:08,300 I said now! 856 01:31:09,870 --> 01:31:12,600 Nigel, you can't leave me on me own here! 857 01:31:12,600 --> 01:31:15,170 You're the only thing I've got! 858 01:31:15,170 --> 01:31:18,640 I'll make up for everything. I'll cook anything you want me to. 859 01:31:18,640 --> 01:31:21,910 Please, Nigel, say something to me. 860 01:31:21,910 --> 01:31:23,610 Thank you. 861 01:31:23,610 --> 01:31:27,550 What do you mean, thank you? 862 01:31:27,550 --> 01:31:29,890 What do you mean, thank you?! 863 01:31:31,750 --> 01:31:34,760 What do you mean?! 864 01:31:34,760 --> 01:31:39,160 Nigel! Come back, Nigel! 865 01:31:39,160 --> 01:31:41,400 Nigel Slater! Come back here now! 866 01:31:48,900 --> 01:31:51,610 - So, how old are you really? - 17. 867 01:31:51,610 --> 01:31:54,640 - But you have worked in a kitchen? - Yeah. 868 01:31:54,640 --> 01:31:56,610 I do a very good lemon meringue. 869 01:31:56,610 --> 01:31:58,810 That's what they all say, sunshine. 870 01:32:06,520 --> 01:32:09,490 - All right, you're on. - Are you sure? 871 01:32:25,270 --> 01:32:28,480 You're going to be fine. You're really going to be fine.